Sadly, this is not me. This is a leggy model, at Hayman's (and my)beach
The Sun Goddess awaits: my transport to Hayman Island is a gleaming white launch awash with sparkling wine.
The smooth journey from Great Barrier Reef Airport on Hamilton Island to Hayman takes an hour, which is long enough to nibble at a plate of canapes and toast the journey with flutes of sparkling wine from the Hunter Valley's Bimbadgen Estate.
A little box with chocolates handmade on the island includes a white-chocolate prawn: that's a first.
Alongside me on the Sun Goddess are urbane European couples (the women carry delicious handbags), newlyweds from Japan and a few families.
'm told the resort is almost full when I arrive, yet I see but a handful of people the entire time I'm there. "It's the great mystery of Hayman," says a Hayman staffer, Sam. "Where does everyone go?"
If they're one of a privileged few - and I've joined this elite group for only a few days - they're most likely at a beach villa.